Wednesday, April 2, 2008

My monologues

Bismillah~~


It's so quiet right now. The only sounds I heard are the buzzing of the fan and the sounds of typing from my keyboard.

I shouldn't go online now. When I already have tonnes of things to do... to study, to comprehend, to memorize, to write... but I couldn't help from writing down what I feel now. I feel so down. So lost. And hopeless...

I couldn't help but thinking of ...
Why is everything so hard? God help me... I feel so weak. Like the world is closing in to me.
Like I would fail everything...

Sometimes, I wish I didn't do what I did. Sometimes I wish everything is the way it was. Sometimes, I do regret hurting someone unintentionally...
Sometimes....

But I know without pain, there is no gain.
And I know that we learned from our mistakes... no matter how hard it is...

I don't usually get what I want in life... and sometimes I even expect not to get what I want.
But there is a little hope left... to change everything... to get what I want...

When you love someone but you can't have her, you let her go... You'll do anything to make her happy, no matter how hard it is for you. The ultimate love is when you care and love someone...
Even when you can't have her... to make her happy wherever she is... Whomever she's with... Isn't that what love is all about? To make someone you love - happy.

And if you can't, probably you don't really love her... You're just obsessed with her. Or maybe it is just an infatuation... You love the idea of the two of you together...

Maybe...


**************************************************************************************

Subhanallah...so green and beautiful....
I need to be here...

**************************************************************************************

Alhamdulillah~~

3 comments:

apex merc said...

no...u won't fail everythg
trust me =)
stil got time left k

Blooming Sakura said...

Let's pray so...

Anonymous said...

itu apek a' cilita manyak mutut ooo... lu a' stil manyak masa maaa... -along bukit beruntung-